I saw you and my soul lit up
God said, “No”
The Church said, “No”
But my heart said, “Yes”
Hearts are notorious liars
Weaving dangerous fantasies that
Burn too hot and fierce in the
Dim light of the lone and dreary world
So my heart, bright and shy
Went into a box
Onto a shelf bearing your name
And I settled for “good enough”
Daily it beat, pulsing
With fine golden rays of hope
For a future I could never have
If increase was my goal
I forged a sturdy lock
From my cruelest thoughts
“You are a beloved child of God
And this is the path you chose”
I swaddled my heart in every wish
Every dream I had when we spoke
And buttressed the shelf with
A bitter resin of my own design
They say families can be together forever
Can, not will
And if your shelf, my shelf broke
What starlight would I forfeit?
Yet my heart was not the liar
It was the solitary point of honesty
Waiting patiently for me,
Safe and protected in its box
What I found within
When I was brave enough
To open it was
A scorching flame
That burned down my shelf
And led me
Like a beacon
Back to you.
Speechless . . .
I have no words. Excuse me while I weep in a corner.
I keep coming back and reading this… It’s hauntingly real. It shouldn’t be, but it is.